Toxic Tensions

 How to deal with toxic people who hate you for no reason whatsoever? You, too, must have met people who love to hate you, who try their utmost, most often in the process rendering themselves ridiculous, to reduce you to pulp they can throw away as and when they wish to, right? 

How indeed to deal with toxic people who hate and ill-treat you for no rhyme no reason? First and foremost, accept that actually their fight is with themselves. This universal truth must be accepted that they have a very negative self-image. Basically, they need a vehicle to release their inner turmoil, negativity, and most importantly, self-hatred.

Most probably, you are a soft target to them. The reasons could be multiple. Such people, for instance, realise instinctively that you are not the sort to fly in to a rage, and create a huge scene. They sense instinctively that you hate to hurt. They take advantage of your gentleness. You must have seen that they would never harass a person who will give them a tit for a tat.

Yet another major reason could be that they themselves have been hated from childhood. There is a huge deficit in their life of love. They need to take out that hurt, anger, despair  within themselves, and you happen to be the unfortunate vehicle. 

At the work place especially, they would be quite close to a self-obsessed power-monger, and you are a thorn in the (lady, too, mind you) boss' flesh, once again for no purpose! Well, such birds of a feather, too, flock together!

In the familial space, these crooked creatures realise that you care truly deeply for someone close to them. They know perfectly very well that you would not like that person to be hurt, to suffer in any way. They take advantage of your soft corner by subtly letting you know that otherwise the person you care for would be bullied.

Now that we know their psychological profile, how to deal with them? The best way is to plain ignore them. That makes them fly in to a rage. Thus they expose themselves completely and publically which makes everybody realise their cheap meanness. 

Should one confront them? Undoubtedly, yes, but only when there is a concrete, inalienable proof of their crookedness. Otherwise, such smarties can get you in to trouble for their tantrums.

Personally, I am of the opinion that one should use such toxicity to introspect and to weed out all possible faults within oneself. One should use even their baseless criticism to delete any and every possible lacunae within oneself. One should always think of one's worst critic as the guide to a better self, right?

Next, one should just laugh at them, at times, publically shaming them. Most importantly, however, never ever get down to their cheap level. The worst deal evil can dish out is to tarnish you with its own ugly stupidity.

Never ever fall a prey to such a trap. Instead, if you have a confidante, tell her about the subtle viciousness. Write about it, otherwise. Get it out of your system. Plain forget the toxic tensions. Life is too precious to be wasted on creeps!

Pratima@ Turn the tables on toxic tensions, and escape unscathed!