To keep or not to keep the fast? That is the question! Yes, that is often the psychological state of many women, and often becomes an existential theme/threat circa the beginning of 'Shravana'.
Why? Well, against keeping a fast, there is a huge hue and cry. It appears old-fashioned to the majority. Well, such ignoramuses need to be told that keeping a fast occasionally is considered the most modern technique by the hip hep happening dieticians. In other words, modernity/tradition is not wafer (literally, please) thin.
Most often, keeping a fast is frowned upon by the feminists. The argument is, does a bridegroom keep a fast to get a perfect proposal? Why should women alone keep the hartalika vrat, pray, keep a fast to bag the future Mr. Perfect?
Well, easy equivalences of the I-versus-you variants are spurious in my opinion. Such fasts should be a personal choice in my opinion because the inner equation between a couple/within the familial space is an on-going and eternal process of give-n-take, right?
Well, a fiance/husband may not make a cup of perfect, or otherwise, tea for the woman when she returns home after a hectic day. He may be helping out though in many other simple but focal ways. The 'to-be-hated' mother-in-law may be a better support system when compared to a creche for the young couple, right?
Should not such decisions be freed of a guilt trip? Imposing a blanket no-no against a fast is equally fascist and an interference in the personal space, and a road-block in the search for a just and happy society, right?
Why always 'react'? Why never 'respond'? Any 'opposition for the sake of opposition' strategy is peurile, reductionist and downright vicious and silly. Instead, negotiations open up a constructive dialogue in my opinion.
Look at issues from an alternative perspective, I would say. The 'hartalika' is a celebration of a bride's choice, for instance, because Parvati observed it to marry Shiva, a choice the whole world waxed against! Well, creative solutions construct a better being and becoming!
Pratima@'Fast'-n-loose may be an intellectual fashion rather than a thought through response!
In the professional contexts, there are very many adjustments often made by an employee, right? We do not disagree and fight with a silly boss every nano second, right? Why then reduce the in-laws into villains just because you dislike a ritual they follow?
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